I’m feeling a little warmer today than on usual days. (yeah, you got it right, I’m under the influence of just a little alcohol tonight) but that’s not the whole point of me writing this. Today, I realized how much of a guy am I (Nah, screw what you’re thinking I’m not a lesbo! I like guys, hot witty guys in particular) I just realized I never acted so lady-like (In as much as I want to it’s an everyday struggle ) I’m not your Ms. Prim and Proper who would be conscious of her every move. I don’t laugh like a lady I just burst out in loud laughs and I don’t care at all.
While other girls won’t even eat at all if life would make it possible for their survival, I on the other hand have a very big appetite. I’d eat every single chance I get I’m basically a pig on two feet. My family and friends would call me a construction worker (I can’t believe I’m telling you this) and my mom would occasionally reprimand me for eating too much in public. As she says it’s not lady-like and I should be ashamed eating like I do in front of my friends (that’s why they’re called friends right? They’d take you for who you are). My mom grew up from a conservative Spanish-Filipino family. She’d act and dress conservatively not to mention my dad was her first and last (that’s also the case with my aunt). On the contrary, I grew up not having a single Barbie doll. I preferred toy cars and helicopters (I swear I’m a girl!) it’s just that everyone expected me to be a baby boy but unto everyone’s surprise I came out to be a bouncing baby girl. However, my dad treated me as his junior and would call me jr (Yah don’t call me that now).
How am I supposed to act like a lady? I grew up that my playmates were guys and yes when I was in first grade my elder sister had been called by the principal because I had beaten a classmate of mine (who happens to be a guy). When I moved on to elementary and high school where I started to discover things, you won’t see me at the party scene like most girls do but you sure can find me by the cliff, trying to climb with my friends, taking an adventure to the rainforest or the old Japanese hospital ruins by a deserted part of an island. I moved to college and guess what, we were only 4 girls in my class and the rest of the 27 students were boys, economics normally has the least population.
So why am I writing this, I am now working in a department where people are so lady-like and so prim & proper good thing everyone in my team are of the same frequency and wave length as I am. I just don’t know if I should feel a little ashamed that I am a little boyish but hey, I’m comfortable this way!