For the Longing and the long gone

The last rain drop fell into Sarah’s innocent soul that suddenly glided into her chest and down into the curves of her body. She continued walking mindless of the dangers of the town at night. As soon as she finds her way back to her senses, it was the fine cotton quilt that rubbed against her skin.

Now, aware as she finally was, she knew she was lying in bed. She opened her arms wide moving towards Angelo’s chest that whispers about what the luminous night brings to their flesh both screaming for desire’s satisfaction. The clock ticked slowly as their bodies drew closer moving against their loud heartbeats. Urged by their strong desires their warm lips touched. Eyes closed and the thirst of their flesh was quenched with passion.

Just as when Sarah thought it really was love, her chastity belonged to Angelo. There were no traces of hesitations or second thoughts in her face instead, she gave up everything for her love. There were minutes of silence around it was only the slapping sound of the sea against the shore. Before the sun peeped, they both realized that the long night was over. Sarah stayed in bed with him spilling her words of fidelity which was absorbed slowly into his pores that made him gasp for air. From then on, Angelo’s world was a total change from cages of gray to Sarah’s lavender leaves and green coffee.

Sarah was the most faithful woman I knew these days. And perhaps the modern martyr. She intimately spent her sweetest days and nights with her lover giving him literally everything she had. Sarah sees him wearing her future, but she was doubtful of Angelo’s silence every time she speaks about seeing herself settling down with him. I can see fear in Sarah’s face as she thought of Angelo’s silence but the night came wherein the long intimacy they have been spending together, he finally took Sarah’s fear telling her of the future just as how she thought. Sarah’s face was suddenly painted into hues of yellow and red portraying the happiness that plays within her young looks.

She pictured everything perfectly alive. He was all she thought she needed and everything her soul deserved. They both stood their distant love affair. Although he was far, she had so much hope that in the long run, she would still find herself with her only love. Swiftly, I looked into the mirror where I saw her as if she played Juliet longing for her Romeo. A longing that would soon again pour within her the moment Angelo goes back to the city where his life is.

The day came when he had to leave. Tears sailed through Sarah’s eyes and never found its shore to where it must stop. Angelo left and never came back.

A couple of seconds to breathe, the cold rain started to pour from the grey sky. It was a memory that vividly reminds me of La Union. He again walked into my memory.


Hark Back

She was his living Eden
His furtive version of Paradise
He vanishes
She walks on mid air


I have never appreciated looking out the window since the peaceful nights of April. The soggy streets, pale lights, the city skyscrapers at night together with the few people that walked by have always been the view of midnight but if there’s any difference tonight, it’s the rain that pours from the thick clouds and the wind that dances with my curtain sheets. An inevitable force dictates me to travel back to my dreams that seemed impossible, to my wishes that patiently clung to hope, to the times I wish were changed and to the moments I hope were still here.

Liquor bottles have been starting to pile up but the nights have not gone any sweeter. On different nights, I take a walk down that long avenue. I would love the comfort of the cold wind that rubs against my skin it reminds me of those November nights. It’s where I find comfort or it’s what I at least thought. It’s heading me back to the start.

How long has it been since that time we first spent waiting for the city sunrise? Or maybe the first morning I watched you ‘til you woke? Or maybe that midnight you came knocking on my door on a surprise? Everything slipped too fast, too fast that I didn’t have enough time to savour it before it’s gone.

Those days have departed, so long departed but just this morning, you were clothing yourself on my bedside or at least I would like to believe it’s still here but ill-fated as it may seem it’s gone, so long gone.

There have been too many episodes of leaving and coming back. You leave as if there was nothing to lose and comeback as if you never left. Every time you come around, I am not sure how long will it last but I am sure that it’s only a matter of time before you mess it all up. We’ve been running around circles, stuck repeating the same mistakes.

I used to think time itself would offer a great escape but it hasn’t gone any further.

I’m still here, still caught.


It came on a surprise at the end of a bad day. It came just in time when she needed an escape, just a week before Santa started to drop off his gifts for the season.
It began on a slow pace, then came that first morning ever when they were damn stuck in the car from traffic.

He was tapping on the wheel, learning how to whisper the loudest screams and so they burst into chuckles at the silly thought.

Then the daylight has finally touched the first day of February it was supposed to be her usual mind-numbing Sunday just like how she was used to, except this time he decided to kill the boredom.

They took off driving around the metro devouring the best foods and fulfilling the cravings of their appetite and just hours before the moon touches the ground they got lost in the woods, driving around circles just savouring time.

It was indeed not just another normal Sunday but the best Sunday was waking up from the aroma of fresh eggs and cream served straight right out of the pan for her breakfast, his version of omelettes.

Just when she thought it was bliss, just the moment she said it was perfect and just when she felt she had nothing to wish for,

She woke up the next day only to find out it’s all gone in a snap just when she was ready to take the risk, no warnings, not even signs, she never saw it coming.

On a November down that avenue

The gleaming night was fading and I found myself walking on the same street where I was a year ago but somehow, the pavements have been changed to bricks from the old warped cement, signboards have now been mounted for directions, a new store is now standing at the empty lot that used to grow shrubs and post lights have been added on every corner, lighting every inch of the street but if there was anything that hasn’t changed, it’s the flowers bursting with colours that bloomed on the sidewalk.

I used to think that this street would not get any better but that was because I used to love the place just the way it was. I have admired the place no matter how my feet ached from getting caught by some of the holes that have been formed on its old pavement. I love how it makes me picture those nights walking uncertainly under the dim lights, just breathing the air. I have never anticipated nor even thought of the vast changes, not within a year, not even today.

The road now offers mouth watering and inviting fairs, the finest pleasures that weren’t at hand back from those days. I would have never noticed I have slipped past time.

As I walked pass every store the glimmer of the glass caught my reflection, I have not even been aware of the changes from my face. The silhouette that formed from the shadow has made me realize that I might have forgotten time, I was getting older too.